I Fear Your Love
by TheBlackRaveness
Summary: One of the guardians reflect on their relationship in comparison to Tidus and Yuna. Who is the poor love stricken guardian? (PG13 for suggestive themes and brief full frontal nudity)


Disclaimer: I sadly don't own SquareSoft Characters…and I say this with a heavy heart. :: Pouts :: This is one of my more depressed mode stories…I think. Either way PG-13 for suggestive themes and brief full frontal nudity 

^ .. ^

Lulu (Looks up from a Spirian Beauty Magazine): It's not me is it?

Wakka: Ah-ha! You wish, Lu! Ya?

Auron (Smacks Wakka in the back of the head): You don't speak to a lady like that.

Tidus: Wakka you're just jealous you don't have a rack!

Yuna (Shocked): TIDUS! 

Lulu: Hey, enough everyone! Just get on with it!

Author: But…but…but…I'm having fun!

Kimahri: Kimahri annoyed…continue

Lulu: Just scroll passed this, readers. Ignore our ramblings.

Author: Oh-ho! Hold up, before we _continue_ :: glares at Lulu :: I need to do something first :: scribbles something down on a piece of paper, and suddenly Auron's clothes vanish. All he's left with is his sunglasses and his Masamune ::

Auron (Covering himself indignantly): What's the big idea?

Author: Tee-hee! :: knocks Auron unconscious and carts him off to…::

* Scene Missing *

:: Auron comes back with a cigarette and ruffled hair. His arm lazily wrapped around the author ::

Auron: Hey wanna go do that…

* Scene Missing *

Rikku: Augh…Just move on while those two go do…

* Scene Missing *

I cast my gaze to the ceiling, tears threatening to spill from my eyes. I hurt so much. Your soft breaths completely void out tonight's earlier events. I feel like I'm just an empty shell of what used to be here. What used to be here before you came along…tore my innocence away. All I know is I'm hopelessly in love with you and your gentleman-like manner. Two words whispered off your parched lips bring my attention back to the reality of pain, and listening cautiously as you murmur in your sleep. "_I'm sorry._" A lone tear runs down my fragile cheek.

__

Your lost words whisper slowly, to me

Still can't find what keeps me here

But all this time I've felt so hollow, inside

I know your still there…

The sunlight spills through the diminutive perforation in the pale blue curtains, and I manage to slip unnoticed out from under your arm that was lazily placed on my stomach while you slept. Creeping quietly to the bathroom, I shut the door the silence only broken by a soft click. I gazed grimacing at my nude reflection. I let my glare travel to the reflection of misted over emerald spirals. Who was this staring back at me? I felt a wave of anguish invade my vacant thoughts. I still love him, _don't I_? Swiping a sandy blonde lock that freed itself, behind my ear, I sneaked back into the room I shared with you. Stealthily I snatched my clothes that were carelessly thrown to the floor and began to dress. I felt your gaze bore into my back, but I decided to ignore it, and pretend you were still asleep. 

__

Watching me, wanting me

I can feel you hold me down

Fearing you, loving you

I won't let you hold me down

Before we all know it, morning turns into afternoon and the sun beats down on our backs as we travel the long path. I march by your side, a sleeved arm tossed lazily over my petite shoulders. My delicate arms wrapped around your waste, and I lean into you as we walk. The others accepted our relationship almost as instantaneously as when I fell in-love with you when I saw you for the first time. You looked so intimidating, but I never knew about that sweet gentle creature that was hidden deep inside. I notice you're staring at me, I look up with half-smiling eyes; you're grip around me tightens as we continue to walk. We're all walking in a comfortable silence. I enjoy the smell of your cologne mingling with the scent of your sweat. The soft heart beats from deep within that broad chest makes me smile…you're still here…still alive…not a dream.

__

Haunting you, I can smell you, alive

Your heart pounding in my head

Watching me, wanting me

I can feel you hold me down

I let my naïve thoughts prattle on before I decided to allow reality to sink in again. The gentle beast always has a violent thought just waiting to be acted on. That this _loving_ relationship wasn't so loving. I feel your glare bore itself into the top of my head as I seemingly almost try to shrink away from your grasp. That night when you saw me, that night I lost all my innocence. Your kind threats forced me to stay silent on the topic. I cried and you merely left, I had tried so hard to salvage a minute fleck of my purity…but it was all ripped away viciously. My grip around you loosens and I shrink away even more, only for your strong arm to squeeze my shoulders closer to your broad frame. I flinched in pain. Reluctantly I returned to my normal grip I had around your waist.

Seeing me, raping me

Watching me

Almost routinely now every night to every other night you make the same request, and I make the same response. I never learn. You do it any ways. But today it's just your pining gaze that silently asks, and I feel invisible hands clasping my wrists in a vice like grip. The thought of that unknown menacing glare boring deep into my eye sockets, and your crushing weight on top of mine send shivers through my spine. You only squeeze tighter as if trying to melt me into you. I feel your curious stare, your pining thoughts, and that vice grip on me as if I'd run away. I know it was going to happen again tonight, and I still won't let you. I still won't let you hold me down, and I still won't let you try to take away the innocence that isn't there. Yet I stay…boggles my own thoughts. My naïve mind then just came up with a conclusion as I stared at the summoner and her Zanarkand love holding each other lovingly as we marched. Did Tidus treat Yuna the same way? Maybe it's just because I'm an Al-Bhed and you're just an excommunicated Yevonite that still follows the beliefs remotely. My thoughts had made up its own mind. I fear your way of _showing_ love. 

__

Watching me, wanting me

I can feel you hold me down

Fearing you, loving you

I won't let you hold me down.

Author's Notes: This really isn't an Aurikku :: frowns :: and I can't believe I just made Auron become a rapist and a pedophile in the same story. But…all fantasies of perfect men must come to an end sometime, you know. But why my Auron? Why? *Cries* This story is supposed to be kind of vague…just for the mind to wonder who the two are until the end of the story. I know I shouldn't really extenuate the matter of such a "_serious_" story…but hey that's just my nature. Review please!

"Haunted" By Evanescence.


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